June 3, 2000
When we were considering moving into this neighborhood, I
was concerned about the potential and assumed imminent trouble with the other
residents in the area and that we, the gay community, would be rejected. I wanted to challenge Angie and myself
to take on a new city with new neighbors and come in open minded with a clean
slate. I hope we can be the future
and the inspiration for a lot of the community members here. It was by no means and as acceptance
but I am happier than I ever have been.
Coming out to my family was the easiest part of the hardest battle I have
ever brought upon myself.
I tried for so long to “de-gay” myself. I had boyfriends all through high
school but I always felt like they were my best friends and nothing more. I dated this girl secretly for two
years- she was on the swim team with me and we were “best friends” to the
general public. Every time we
would travel to another city we would be bunked together in the hotel but the
second the alarm went off the next morning for our meets it was like absolutely
nothing had happened hours before.
It was the most emotionally draining experience I have ever had to
endure. I went on to swim at the
University of Michigan on scholarship and at that point I was too tired of
waking up every day and lying to myself.
I hated that for 20 years I had been playing a character that wasn’t
me. One night I came home for
Thanksgiving break after my freshman year at school. I sat down with my dad and
he looked at me and said “Carrie, life isn’t a dress rehearsal. You only get one chance- so do it
right.” He patted me on the
shoulder and walked inside to get my little cousins ready for bed.
There have never been explicit words exchanged that I am gay
and he is okay with it, but he knows and I know and we are both comfortable
with that.
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